Pumpkins and Scarecrows

I just want to run away.


Get me out of this place.

Reminder:

Put yourself out there.
You let him get to you, but that is okay.
You are allowing yourself to feel something for once.

Remember that it is okay to get hurt. You can only be has happy and love as much as the strongest pain and hurt you allow yourself to feel.

This is part of this magnificent journey we call life.
Not only can we feel the greatest pleasures, but we can feel the most intense horrific pain.
Most people would turn away at the thought of getting hurt, but you are different my dear. You embrace every emotion that life has to offer to you. Embrace these feelings no matter what they are.

Every situation makes you stronger and teaches you something about life and yourself.

Be brave, just fall.

Untitled

What do you do when you think that one of your best friends is about to make a decision that could change the rest of their life, and possibly not for the better. A decision based on another person, on love, or maybe just lust. I just don't understand how you could give up a life you've carved out for yourself in this little town. I know here isn't permanent, but you have friends here. And people that think of you as family. I don't understand how this boy could want you to give all that up for him. In part I think that's selfish of him, and the other part of me wonders why he would do that for you when he knows how situations like that turn out because he has been through them himself.

What do I do? Can I do anything really?

Connect.

We all create our own path through life as we travel through uncharted territory.
Our trails intertwine with others, publicizing our interactions with people.
Our paths are not identical, like some, but they do cross at unexpected moments.
I've always seen you, but you have never seen me.



I can remember the first time we met.
That sweet summer day, sitting on the veranda.
Your long, golden hair flowing over the guitar that rested on your lap.

I saw you then, as I see you now.
You, my dear, are so very beautiful.



So many words have gone unspoken.
So many feelings kept locked away, deep inside my soul.
I've wanted to touch you, to feel your warm breath on my body for as long as I can remember.
Dreaming. Hoping, that one day I could experience you.


Well, that day has come and gone.
The universe heard my countless wishes on 11:11, and finally granted it.


You, my dear, are so very beautiful...




But this is not the end of the story, just the end of the chapter.
Our paths will cross again.

Mmm, country boys!

Earlier this evening, I was having a conversation with an old friend from high school. Her and her boyfriend have been dating for almost 4 years now. At first, she did not want to date him but my other friend and I told her to just give him a chance. Well, she did give him that chance. Four years later, they are happier than they could ever be. But, the point of this story is this:

She told me tonight, that her boyfriend has grown up a lot since I had last seen him. She said that he has turned into this country boy who always wears plaid shirts (or no shirt), cowboy boots, and that he always sings country songs. She also told me that sometimes, he will clean out his garage, turn on country music, and slow dance with her while singing quietly along in her ear.

Now to me, this is pure perfection. Why aren't there more cute, country boys out there who are as romantic as this?


I'm actually kind of jealous. =/

Cinderella.

I have this fairytale woven into the crevices of my brain.
It allows me to travel to magnificent places and dream extraordinary things.
The life I yearn for is tangled up in this little imaginary ball of string.
This ball grows incessantly, forming a tumor.
It is a cancerous tumor – slowly suffocating my reality: inhibiting me from growing and living an honest life.
Hydrochloric acid replaces the blood in my brain, surging through it like water out of a faucet.
Attempting to kill this tumor, I scream while tears are rolling down my warm, red cheeks.
I want to carve it out with a jagged knife, just so I can sew it back up.
I want it to leave a scar, I want to remember.
I want to finally be capable of recognizing and appreciating the beauty in each day that I am alive.


I have been living a lie for as long as I can remember; trying to make my reality live up to the marvelous ideas inside my head, and everyday fell short.
I want to be reminded to care for my imagination as if it were a child; I need to tend to it daily, making sure it's not strong enough to overpower me.
I need to live in reality, and I think I'm finally getting there.

A Split Second

We all need a little inspiration, a spark to light the fire in our souls.